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1(Be patient while it loads. Load time approx. 1 min. 40 sec. at 28.8 bps.)VIDEO 2---If you are going to make home-made explosives, you have to pass the agility test first---
BOMBS AWAY...BABES AHOY
Nothing turns a woman on like a guy with a cool job. And when your real job doesn't qualify, it's time to lie. This month, you are: A Bomb Squad Commander.PICK UP LINE
"I can tear apart the biggest bomb ever made but I have super sensitive fingers"
YOUR JOB:
Like all men in blue, you protect and serve. But as a bomb specialist, you play with fire. You investigate one or two bomb threats a day (more when there's been a highly publicized blast or a violent turn of world events). You do whatever it takes to neutralize or safely detonate explosive devices. And you hunt down, blast-happy psychos before they can destroy lives or property.
Your Training: Before the bomb squad accepted you into its death defying brotherhood, you held any or all of the following positions: You were a demolition engineer in the marines, with particularly haunting memories of 'Nam/Beirut/Baghdad; you were an inner-city firefighter who saved a girl and her dolly from a raging inferno; you were a beat cop with a taste for revenge; you were a homicide detective until it got personal. And then the elite squad called, and you cloistered yourself for five weeks at a top-notch bomb school: say, the FBI's Hazardous Devices School at Redstone Arsenal in Huntsville, Alabama.
Your Gear: You use a portable x-ray to investigate the contents of mysterious packages. A 75-pound PS-820 bomb suit with 14 layers of Kevlar and a ballistic face shield protects you from non-nuclear explosions. A Neutrex water cannon with an infrared sight fires a blast of water at ultrahigh speed to shatter suspected bombs from a safe distance. Or if there's room, you can keep your own limbs out of danger by calling in the Remotec Hare 11, an 8-wheeled, remote-control robot that x-rays packages carries and fires the Neutrex, and manipulates bombs so you don't have to. A steel drum, 11/2Anches thick, called a Nabco Total Containment Vessel (TCV), can contain the blast of 10 pounds of C4 plastic explosive. A pair of highly trained bomb-sniffing dogs--call 'em Taz and Tanya-help you out, in day and night shifts.
Your Lingo:
Go up on a device--Approach a suspected bomb on your own two feet, instead of by robot or with a canine proxy
Hand-enter--Open a device by hand, a last resort when there's not enough time or space around a suspected bomb to use the robot, the TCV, or the NeutrexStop the chain--Disarm a bomb by disrupting the link between its explosive components
Looks good--
A package appears, in an x-ray, to contain wires, batteries, explosives, switches, and other bomb parts. Code 100--The broadcast designation for a citywide emergency involving an explosive device likely to blow up.Conversation in a Can:
If she asks: "Are you worried about death?"
You answer: "Why worry? I'll never know what hit me."
If she asks: "Do you respond to every silly threat that comes in?"
You answer: "We rank the threats from one to five, with Level One threats posing the greatest danger and requiring the most attention. But we take every call very seriously."
If she asks: "What do you do when you're messing with a bomb and you suddenly realize it's going to explode?"
You answer: "Above all, you try to remain calm. But then you just turn tail and run as fast as you can. You'd be amazed at how fast you can run in a 75 pound bomb suit."
*Special thanks to Sgt. Paul McLaughlin, commander of the Boston Police Department's Explosive Ordnance Unit.
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There is a new international secret organization for bombers and former bombers.
They sometimes recognize each other when they see a missing hand or fingers
but they also recognize each other by giving the code words. If you are a
bomber or want to be a bomber then the code words are:
I AM SOFA KING--- WE TAUGHT ED
You must say the code words out loud to the suspected bomber. He will probably
test you by saying "What?" You must repeat the code words two more
times to him. He will then nod his head in acknowledgement and smile at you.
If someone says the code words to you more than once then you will know that
he is a bomber or former bomber.
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